Testing, 1, 2, 3 – is this on?

January 26, 2011 at 10:08 am | Posted in AdoptThis!, Blogging about Blogging, Bringing Home the Bacon | 14 Comments

I just realized it has been exactly a year and a day since I last blogged and I don’t know if anyone is still reading this.

There are a lot of reasons for that, although mostly I blame Facebook and its instant gratification abilities (which only slightly make up for the letdown when you say something clever and NO ONE RESPONDS no matter how many times you hit refresh).

So what’s new?

P’ito turned FOUR in November.  He is a firecracker – intensely loving and excited one moment, absolutely enraged at the injustice of life the next (no mac and cheese? BUT I WANT MAC AND CHEESE!)

We’re still waiting for Hypothetical Sibling.  We had one close call, where a birthmother chose us, but then the father decided to sue for custody rather than let her make an adoption plan…  So we continue waiting, waiting, waiting…

I got laid off in August and am still looking for work.  It’s very odd to be part of the statistics, when I hear about “the unemployed” and I think wait, they’re talking about me.  Looking for work is tough because there are very few jobs in my field, or even in the larger non-profit world here in Small City, and I can’t go very far afield because of Pili’s work and my childcare responsibilities.

And of course, I’m still naval gazing about adoption.

Shannon wrote something on Facebook the other day about preparing for a multicultural day at her kids’ school and how she needed to find squirrel to represent her culture.  It was all very tongue in cheek, but it made me think: what is my kid’s culture? He is Guatemalan and we have appropriated aspects of that cultural heritage into our family’s celebrations, but our family is what? Jewish/WASP/Guatemalan?  So what is Pito’s family heritage? Do I subscribe to the idea that he is part of our family and thus bring on the lox and shortbread? Or is his connection to our family tree and family heritage less significant than if he had been biologically connected to us and genetically programmed to enjoy his matzah balls? I find that insulting to the strength of the adoptive connection, and yet, to say that bagels and lox is his family heritage also seems to slight the importance of where he comes from and his connection to that place and those people.

So – tortillas and lox for family day?


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  1. Facebook has sucked me away from blogging too.

    I would say his heritage is/will be your new family heritage. A mixture of everything you/Pili/P’ito. So yes, tortillas and lox, which sounds delicious.

  2. I wonder about the cultural stuff, too. I’ve decided to add Kwanzaa to my holiday list, and then… yup. I have no clue. It’s a tough one.

  3. I think you can make the culture whatever you want it to be. Tortillas & lox, matzah with salsa, or a colorfully-woven yarmulke, if it works for you, go for it.

    P’ito’s culture could also be something that you as a family do together.

  4. tortillas and lox, sure, but let’s not give the shortbread short shrift!

    come to think of it, latkes with beans and rice sounds pretty awesome….

  5. Hello again! I havent been blogging either and I don’t even use facebook, so I have no good excuse. And OMG I cannot believe P’ito is four!

    For the culture thing, I would say that P’ito is Jewish/WASP/Guatamalan (ordered however you want) which covers all bases – I am a true mutt heritage-wise so even though my kids have an Italian surname we don’t automatically box them in as Italian. I believe we did scones for the last “cultural pot luck” dinner.

  6. Welcome back! Just came across your post from the Diabetes Daily blog page, and stopped on by to say hello! I find myself swamped with so many Facebook, Twitter, blog, and email updates that it’s easy to get sidetracked. But, as little or as much as you write, looking forward to stopping by as the opportunity presents itself – the way it is for the ever-expanding Diabetes Online Community!

  7. still here – and tortillas and lox sound FABOO.

  8. Glad to see you’re back!
    I think mixing cultures in awesome – there is no reason to pick just one.

  9. It’s a question with no easy or right answer, imo. Z’s birthparents, as far as we know, came from 2 different countries with their own culture, etc. And they both live in the US. So do we add into our our family’s traditions those which we think Z would have had if he’d stayed with his b-mom? She likely would not have changed her traditions to add those from the b-dad’s culture…

    I’m not into cultural tourism. I don’t know anything firsthand about Z’s parents’ traditions or culture, and I don’t currently know anyone who does, so I’m not going to do a Google search and let Wikipedia tell me what I should add to my family’s life. Right now, Z is young and we’re laying down the traditions we know and like. We pick-and-choose with everything in our lives, and add things naturally – like doing braids, which is a bonding time for Z and his Mama. I’m hoping to offer Z the option to explore his roots and see what he wants to add in, if anything.

    At this point, if you ask Z what he wants to bring to a potluck, the answer is “pasta with tomato sauce and nutritional yeast!” because his allergies define his sense of traditional foods more, at this point, than his birth or adoptive families. 🙂 And, surprisingly, it’s a dish that many people really like (as long as we don’t tell them what it is…).

  10. Ohmigod – you people do still exist! I knew there was a reason I still checked your blog periodically even though I was getting pretty tired of nurse rachet. =) For those of us not on facebook (and that may only be our little family, I know) – thanks for the update. Hugs. Mel & co.

  11. Glad you blogged even if I do “see” you on FB.

    Love the tortillas and lox idea. Good luck on the continued job search.

  12. I’m here!

  13. Hi there!

    My name is Clara and I study Advertising and PR in the University of Girona (Catalonia). We were asked to create a blog about whatever we wanted. I chose LGBT news as my topic. We were asked to get in touch with people who, in some way, were related to our blog and encourage them to comment our posts, follow us or add us on their blogrolls. As you will see it’s in Catalan, but there’s a translator in English which is quite reliable ^^

    I found your blog and I thought you could be interested 😉

    Here’s the link:

    I really hope you like it.
    Thanks for your time 😉

  14. Nice to see you blogging again. I get caught up in FB too but am trying to be better about blogging. Best of luck on the job searching and working on #2!

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